Inexperienced Chili Taster

And I’m back after a months-long blog writing hiatus.

To get my blood flowing and brain juices churning, I’m posting a ‘joke’ my husband sent me via email way back in November 2007 that I’ve been wanting to share (and put some place where I can find it in the future).

For my ‘Let’s clean out the pantry of nearly expired canned goods’ vegetarian (more or less) chili recipe, see my blog post from December 2010 here.
Warning: Stop reading now if you will be offended by some mild profanity and tasteless (pun intended) male commentary (from Judge #3).

A good day to die . . . For chili.

Inexperienced Chili Taster

Notes from an inexperienced chili taster named Frank, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast:

Recently I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chili cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment, and I happened to be standing there at the judge’s table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the other judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn’t be all that spicy, and besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting so I accepted.

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Quick & Easy Almost Vegetarian Spicy Chili Mix

When it gets cold outside, I make it hot in my kitchen with some spicy nearly all-veggie chili.  Besides chopping an onion and celery, there’s not much prep work to this crockpot concoction.

This morning, I pulled out two cans of Bush’s medium chili beans, one can of Bush’s hot chili beans, a can of black beans, a can of original Rotel diced tomatoes and green chilis, a bottle of Spciy V8 juice and a pound of ground turkey.

I browned the ground turkey.  I put all the canned items in the crockpot.  I added the celery and the onion.  I stirred it up well and turned the crockpot to high heat (since I want to eat this in a couple of hours).  I use Williams Famous Chili Kit for my seasoning and extra kick.  Did you know Williams is headquartered just twenty-five miles away from me in Lenexa, Kansas?

I removed the large chili packet from the chili kit box and add it to the crockpot.  Then I add the browned ground turkey.  Then I pour about a third of the 46 ounce bottle of Spicy V8 over the top and stir it all up.

About fifteen minutes before I’m ready to eat, I can add (if I need more ‘heat’) the Red Pepper packet from the chili kit and the Corn Masa packet (which thickens up the chili).

For the all-vegetarian version, substitute cracked wheat for the ground turkey.  You’ll have to soak a couple of cups worth in the Spicy V8 (16 ounces or so) in a small saucepan so that the cracked wheat puffs up and absorbs the tomato juice.  I sometimes add various peppers (red, green, yellow, orange) and chickpeas.

I’ll let you know in a couple of hours how well the chili turned out.  Usually, it’s good and hot!